That's brutal. The memory of that discovery has still got to hurt. But the gaslighting is even worse — it's so destructive and so contemptible. I'm lucky enough to have a husband I trust with my life and my sanity, but my sister's ex was a secret, serial philanderer and the level of deception and projected blame over years and years is what took the heaviest toll on her. It still raises my blood pressure to think about it.