My blood is curdling. No, oh no, you are not a fool. You are a normally socialized individual who has been preyed upon by craven people who spend 100% of their time and brain power scheming to use your normality and decency against you. These people are lower than slime, if a lot smarter. But you do a true public service for sharing this story (which has the added perk of being so clever that I read it aloud to my husband, who guffawed at points).